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A Promotional Poster for Conan the Barbarian
Film,  Podcast

Hops and Box Office Flops: ‘CONAN THE BARBARIAN’

What’s Worst in Life?

A Promotional Poster for Conan the Barbarian

2011’s Conan the Barbarian is as bad of a reboot of a classic film as you are going to find. It’s just a mess, folks.

Its script is often witless, contradicting itself multiple times; and its cast—as distinguished as some of their careers may be—just don’t fit the roles. Worst of all, Jason Mamoa, who plays the titular hero, just didn’t appear ready to bear the weight of Conan‘s broad sword.

As much as the filmmakers purported they wanted to channel the writings of Robert E. Howard, creator of Conan the Barbarian, it more shamelessly robs better films. 

Jason Mamoa as Conan the Barbarian

It should come as no surprise then that this was a massive flop. Budgeted at $90 million, it grossed just over $63 million, snubbing any chances of a sequel. Critics, like audiences, were also unkind. With 152 reviews, it sits at 25% on Rotten Tomatoes (User Score of 30%).

We do get a decapitation and an impalement, though, so it got the violence mostly right. Let’s toast to that!

Now sit back, hack open a Wizard Staff IPA from Two Brothers Brewing, and enjoy your launch from the trebuchet! I, the Thunderous Wizard (@WriterTLK), Chumpzilla, and Mayor McCheese are living, loving, and slaying the night away!

This Week’s Segments:

  • Introduction/Plot Breakdown – The Conan reboot is a soulless slog. (00:00) 
  •  Lingering Questions – After a word from last week’s guestsHop Nation USA, we attempt to determine whether the Mask of Acheron is more off-putting than the pie from Thinner. (33:35)
  • The “The Mystery of Steel” Trivia Challenge – The Double Turn Podcast hits you with an elbow drop from the top, and then I challenge the field to a series of questions about the movie. (52:02)
  • Recommendations – We offer our picks for the week and next up: We continue “Hops and Fantasy Flops” with Krull. (1:00:21)

And, as always, hit us up on Twitter, Facebook, or Instagram to check out all the interesting factoids—the legacy of the Conan character and more—from this week’s episode!

You can find this episode of Hops and Box Office Flops on Apple PodcastsGoogle PlayStitcherPodbeanSpotifyAcastTuneIniHeartRadioVurbl, and Amazon Music!

Thomas Kelly

Writer, Superman aficionado, lover of odd and underperforming sports teams, and co-host of the film adoring podcast, Hops and Box Office Flops