Bladey the Kid
Gallow Walkers is wild west Blade, only if Blade was terrible and went straight to DVD.
With a $17 million budget, that probably wasn’t the plan. But, shit happens and Gallow Walkers is indeed that unsavory term. It’s sort of a shame because the movie isn’t devoid of interesting ideas.
It just executes them poorly, is stuffed with an insane amount of backstory for a 90-minute film, and boasts costumes and sets that look to be straight out of a local theater production. And it doesn’t help that the plot makes very little sense.
Wesley Snipes is Aman (“a man”), a drifter who roams the wasteland murdering Gallow Walkers (the undead, sort of). One problem: Anyone he kills comes back from the dead. What? Why? Well, his mom, who’s a witch, made a deal with the Devil (?) after he was shot avenging the love of his life. I’m not making any of this up; and yes, listeners, in some awful corner of the multiverse, this movie would perpetuate itself until the end of time.
Anyway, this was filmed during Snipes’ issues with the law, which resulted in it sitting on a shelf for years. It even features a fake Snipes doing VO exposition. As comically bad as that is, it’s somehow not even the worst part of the movie.
Now, sit back, quench your thirst with a Dreamland American Lager from Rogue Brewing, and make sure to remove the heads of the dead! I, the Thunderous Wizard (@WriterTLK), Chumpzilla, and Capt. Cash are filing Snipes’ taxes to ensure this never happens again!
This Week’s Segments:
- Introduction/Plot Breakdown – Live by the gun. Die by the gun. Come back for more! (00:00)
- Lingering Questions – After a word from our brothers in beer at Hop Nation USA, we try to make sense of this mess. (26:42)
- The “Whore of Babylon” Trivia Challenge – The Double Turn Podcast gets resurrected after their Casket Match, and then Chumpzilla challenges the field to trivia about the movie. (35:42)
- Recommendations – We offer our picks for the week and next up: We continue “Hops and Blood Sucking Flops” with Vampire in Brooklyn! (43:44)