-
Hops and Box Office Flops: ‘JASON X’
Jason Gonna Give It to You Jason X was probably ahead of its time. In that, it deviates from the series traditionally serious horror roots, replacing traditional scares with unchecked campiness. When it was released in 2001, people were not pleased. Critics didn’t know what to make of it either, slicing it down to a paltry 19% on Rotten Tomatoes. With a $14 million budget, a series high at the time, its $17.1 million gross was also box office murder. Over time, though, its unapologetically goofy premise—taking the titular Jason Voorhees to space—has grown on people. It seems the less serious audiences take Jason X, the more fun they have. And make…
-
Hops and Box Office Flops: ‘CRITTERS 4’
Space Fur Balls Critters 4 is was the second film in the franchise to go straight to video. And it continued the trend of shrinking the scale of the story being told. Like Critters 3, which was set in an apartment building, Critters 4 confines its characters to a claustrophobic space station and gives them very few Crites to deal with. There are literally only two titular Critters in the movie. That feisty alien duo isn’t enough to generate sufficient kills or scares to make this an entertaining entry in the series. Thus despite bringing back franchise favorite Charlie, played as always by Don Keith Hopper, and boasting the talents of horror icon Brad…
-
Hops and Box Office Flops: ‘LEPRECHAUN 4 – IN SPACE’
Irish Emmanuelle in Space Leprechaun 4: In Space is about as low budget as a horror movie sequel can get. Released straight to video in 1997 and produced for a whopping $3 million, it gives most local theater productions a run for their money in terms of set design and costumes. But, should we really expect anything else? Leprechaun 4 is the second of the sequels to be banished directly to video store shelves, and it further frays the series’ strands of believability. Vegas sort of makes sense. But space? Odd plot aside—which involves the titular fairy wooing an alien princess in the hopes of becoming king—Leprechaun 4lacks most of the elements necessary…
-
Hops and Box Office Flops: ‘HELLRAISER IV: BLOODLINE
Written by a Pinhead Hellraiser IV: Bloodline is a typical late 80s/early 90s horror sequel; as in, it’s a cash grab. Sure, it takes Pinhead and his Cenobite minions to space (sort of), but it has nothing truly unique to offer to the series’ lore. And the space element, which was so popular amongst fledgling horror franchises that we’re dedicating an entire month to it, isn’t even present the majority of the film. Hellraiser IV revolves much more around its subtitle, “Bloodline.” It chronicles the history of Lemarchand’s Box, the puzzle box that unlocks the gateway to Hell, covering its original design by French toymaker Philip Lemarchand, through its ultimate use to lock…
-
Hops and Box Office Flops: ‘PREY’
Do Not Kill the Dog Prey reignites the Predator franchise in the best ways possible. It’s more contained—focusing on the story and characters, rather than feeling the need to go bigger. It’s the hit the series desperately needed. After a slew of middling to outright mediocre sequels (and sidequels), Prey optimizes the formula for the alien hunter’s antics. It takes the creature back in time—the northwest plains in 1719—and utilizes the incredible landscapes to set a tone and atmosphere the films have been missing. This is Naru’s journey just as much as it is the Predator’s. She, like the extraterrestrial, is out to prove herself. That is the heartbeat of the movie—one woman’s quest to…
-
Hops and Box Office Flops: ‘VAMPIRE IN BROOKLYN’
Toothless Vampire in Brooklyn is the antithesis of funny. Worse, it’s not at all scary either. When assessing who was involved in its production, neither of those statements should be true. Directed by horror master Wes Craven and principally written by Eddie Murphy (the film’s star), the pedigree was there for it to be a comedic-scare fest. Instead, it’s a muddled and confused mess that too often borders on the offensive. Murphy certainly attempts to run back some gags that worked in the past, but they’re all half-baked. The whole exercise just feels lazy. Listeners, there’s just no blood running through Vampire in Brooklyn‘s veins. Hence its soft box office—$35 million worldwide…
-
Hops and Box Office Flops: ‘GALLOW WALKERS’
Bladey the Kid Gallow Walkers is wild west Blade, only if Blade was terrible and went straight to DVD. With a $17 million budget, that probably wasn’t the plan. But, shit happens and Gallow Walkers is indeed that unsavory term. It’s sort of a shame because the movie isn’t devoid of interesting ideas. It just executes them poorly, is stuffed with an insane amount of backstory for a 90-minute film, and boasts costumes and sets that look to be straight out of a local theater production. And it doesn’t help that the plot makes very little sense. Wesley Snipes is Aman (“a man”), a drifter who roams the wasteland murdering Gallow Walkers (the undead, sort of). One problem: Anyone…
-
Hops and Box Office Flops: ‘MANDY’
Chainsaw Fight Mandy is an absolutely bonkers, psychedelic acid trip loaded with blood, violence, and raw nerve. It’s a tragic film—one where a man witnesses his beloved be burned alive by a religious cult. This action, of course, leaves him no other option than revenge. The brutality, though visually striking, is only a small portion of the movie’s brilliance. Directed by Panos Cosmatos—son of famed director George P. Cosmatos—Mandy delights in its 80s look and feel. It utilizes atmosphere, unique colors, and framing to build upon the disturbing world it forces upon us. Mandy is unapologetically itself; and whether someone wants to be on that ride may depend on their tastes. This can…
-
Hops and Box Office Flops: ‘WILLY’S WONDERLAND’
It’s Your Birthday Willy’s Wonderland is delightful schlock. An unabashed Five Nights at Freddy’s ripoff, it stars Nicolas Cage as the Janitor—the silent protagonist who is stuck cleaning Willy’s Wonderland to pay off a debt. It should come as no surprise that the titular establishment is not on the level. In fact, its troupe of animatronic mascots are actually reanimated serial killers who committed ritualistic suicide before the authorities could apprehend them. Enter the Janitor. He’s there to take out the trash, literally. He is supposed to be the prey, offered to Willy’s Wonderland as a sacrifice from the town. Instead, he is the predator, eliminating Willy’s crew one by one in a variety of violent ways. And…
-
Hops and Box Office Flops: ‘BLACK FRIDAY’
Not Worth the Bargain Black Friday is like if someone took Dawn of the Dead, Army of Darkness, and The Mist, threw them all in a blender, but somehow removed any of the ingredients that made those films so memorable. Biting social criticism? Well, it is there; it just doesn’t work. Humor and over the top, practical gore? Both are in far too short supply. Dramatic tension? Sorry, there are no real scares to speak of. This one, folks, is dead on arrival. And even if it is available for a mega sale, it’s not worth the bargain. Somehow, though, critics did not eviscerate it like one of the insatiable mutants would an unsuspecting…
Your source for DC, Marvel, Star Wars, Valiant, and more!
